"La multi ani" tati!

De cate ori o sa scriu, o sa sterg si o sa rescriu pana cand o sa gasesc cuvintele care sa descrie tot ce vreau sa-ti spun?
De fapt nici nu as vrea sa le folosesc, as vrea doar sa fiu langa tine intr-o zi asa importanta ca asta, sa te iau in brate, sa-ti pregatesc tortul tau preferat de ciocolata, sa stam la masa in curte si sa radem in timp ce pe fundal se aude o melodie de la radio.
Mai tii minte duminicile cand puneai discuri la pick-up cu muzica simfonica si stateam in tacere doar bucurandu-ne de auzul instrumentelor? Sau sambetele cu teleenciclopedia si gogosi de malai?As da orice pentru una dintre ele acum.
Tu mereu spui ca nu e usor sa fii parinte dar tu ai reusit sa imi fii tata, mama, prietenul meu cel mai bun, profesor (iti amintesti cand m-ai invatat sa citesc dintr-un ziar cand aveam 6 ani?), doctor -nicio farmacie nu egaleaza tincturile tale si frectia cu otet de prune cand eram racita.
M-ai invatat ce inseamna respectul si bunul simt, cum sa daruiesti fara sa astepti nimic in schimb, cum sa fii multumit cu ce ai si ca fericirea e drumul in sine nu e ceva ce ne asteapta la capat. M-ai invatat cum sa ma descurc singura, sa fiu independenta,responsabila, sa am opiniile mele si sa iau deciziile gandite la rece. M-ai invatat ce inseamna credinta in Dumnezeu, speranta si dragostea pentru natura, muzica si oameni.
Poate crezi ca daca nu m-ai daruit lucruri materiale, nu ti-ai facut datoria de parinte dar amandoi stim cat de goale si fara substanta sunt cadourile de genul asta, pe cand ceea ce m-ai invatat tu, iubirea si caldura parinteasca raman pentru totdeauna in sufletul meu.
Dar azi e despre tine, nu despre mine de aceea vreau sa-ti multumesc pentru toate astea, sa-ti spun cat de mandra sunt de faptul ca esti tatal meu si ca esti cea mai importanta persoana din viata mea.
Vreau sa-ti multumesc pentru toata rabdarea, dedicarea si timpul in care  ai fost acolo sa ma asculti cand aveam nevoie si sa-mi dai un sfat.Pentru toate eforturile, sacrificiile si noptile nedormite.
Iti doresc atat de multe de ziua ta si in restul zilelor de am nevoie de un pergament pentru dorinte sa le scriu pe toate. Dar cel mai mult as vrea sa ai pace in suflet, sa te poti trezi in fiecare dimineata zambind si sa adormi cu gandul ca ai facut ceea ce trebuie si ai devenit persoana pe care iti doreai sa fii. Sa te aud razand si glumind si sa-ti pastrezi spiritul tanar din suflet indiferent de greutati.
Stiu ca nu o spun prea des dar te iubesc din tot sufletul si asta o sa ramana mereu indiferent de ce se v-a intampla.
"La multi ani tati!"

Far away love...

   And do you know what hurts me more than your silence?
   More than these concrete walls with locked doors you`ve been building between us?
   It hurts me the fact you`re not even thinking how much it affects me. That now you`re not thinking at me at all. How much do I suffer when I should be the first person you can confess to but you`re not even replying to my texts. That I feel you don`t trust me and I`m useless in your life and that this week without me was better for you.
   It hurts me because I thought I know you and I can find a key to any of your issues or any problem we would occur. I`m trying my best to understand you, to give you time to put yourself together. I`m waiting for you not to come with a plan, just to come. To come back to me as we used to be before when we were talking daily 2-3 hours we were loosing track of time and we were so connected in everything.
   What encourages me  is your patience and determination you had when you met me. I was so broken, with my heart in hundreds pieces and my trust smashed. But you risked it and you saw inside the ice cube that I was in, you could read deep inside my soul despite of my way of behaving with you.
   This was the first thing that made me madly fall in love with you. All your attention, your romantic side that makes poetries and play guitar in an amazing way. You are so real with real passions in this superficial world. Your passion, the way you look  me in the eyes and how you teached me to hug.The uncontrolled laughing I can have with you. The way I can behave childlike and carefree when I`m with you. The two dimples on your cheeks when you smile. All your faces changes when you smile. It warms me inside seeing you smiling. It also breaks my heart knowing that you probably aren`t doing that now.
   Oh God! There are so many things I love at you. You are so gentleman, so gentile,so protective and so caring. You want to protect the people you love, the nature, you love animals, want to help anybody you can and make the world a better place. I`m so fascinated with all of these.
   I love you being so mature and thinking twice before saying anything just to make sure you don`t say something unnapropriate. I appreciate your good sense of humour, creativity and spontaneity that makes you such an interesting person.
   I adore it when you call me "mi mujer" and I feel I belong to you and nothing can happen to me because I`m safe and protected.When you were tipsy and we came back from dancing and you whispeared in my ear "you`re the one". Maybe you don`t remember but my inner goddess was aplauding with happiness.
   You asked me before our first date if I ever wrote about love. No, I haven`t because I never felt it this intense. Now I am writing about you mi amor...
   My biggest wish right now is to be loved. I need so much affection to dry all my tears and to calm my heart that is so needy.
   Please open yourself to me! Let me be near you from 10.000 miles away. The way we`ve done it before. We can pass through this together. Don`t push me away. Open your heart to receive my love.

"Estare contigo a pesar de todo. Te lo prometo."